by Kim Avery
“I can do it all by myself.” When my children were two years old, this was a common cry, along with: “Let me do it.” “It’s my turn.” “Don’t help me. I’m big now.” Their message came across very loud and very clear. Independence, strength, and ability were good. Weakness was bad.
Flash forward a few decades and I find these same words now coming from my mouth (or at least my heart.) “I can handle this.” “No problem, I’ve got it all under control.” “Sure, I can do that.” The message? Kim likes to be independent. Kim values being strong. Kim takes great pride in her abilities.
Kim is wrong! (My husband may just print that phrase out and frame it!)
- Receiving much needed help from a friend
If you know anything about my week last week, (see The Letter Bomb), you know that the circumstances of my life had once again stripped off my confident veneer and exposed the raw, unattractive neediness lurking beneath. When cancer strikes a friend – I can’t fix it. I can’t push rewind on time and undo things I wish I hadn’t done. And I can’t make the world obey my will. I want to. But I can’t.
All this weakness led me to the conclusion that last week was a very bad week. Until.
Until God graciously reminded me that…
It’s not up to me, but Him
“My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” (II Corinthians 12:9)
I am to be still and wait
Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still. (Exodus 14:13a,14)
He will come – He will rescue
When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears, and rescues them from all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted, and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord rescues them from them all. (Psalm 34:17-19)
Once again, I will soar
Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. (Isaiah 40:28-31)
Wow.
I forgot that God’s call to me is not to be competent, accomplished, polished, and strong. Instead, God wants me to despair over myself, embrace my weakness, and then run to Him to meet all my needs. “When I am weak, then I am strong.”
I guess last week wasn’t so bad after all. What a blessed relief to loudly say, “I can’t do it but He can.”
